Last month, I mentioned not knowing what Nathan could or could not achieve. I've learned a lot over the years and the two phrases that have resonated and stuck with me the most are:
- Presume competence. - Set the bar higher than you believe your child (or any child) can achieve. Children rise to our lowest level of expectation so lift the bar and see how high they can go. You might be amazed--I was.
- Don't you wish you had a crystal ball instead of hindsight glasses? Yes, I wish it a lot. Even now that things are going so much better...I worry. There, I admit it. I try to rely on instinct, trust in God as I believe people should do and cast your cares...but, in moments of true honesty, I worry.
I could say so much more and give you so many examples of all that Nathan has and is achieving. And I had planned to...but I am afraid you would miss the message in the 'stuff.' Maybe next month I'll give you some examples.
For now, remember:
- Presume Competence.
- My crystal ball was never as clear as my hindsight glasses.
.jpg "Coolestmommy's Coolest Thoughts")
4 comments:
This was EXACTLY what I needed to hear for school conference today - and the simplicity makes it memorable even under stress.
Big thanks!
Any time Full Spectrum Mama. Praying your conference goes well today. Hugs from another spectrum mom.
Yes, always presume competence! I always say this to parents of SPD kids - don't just assume because we have a label that we need to be kept in a box. When I was an undiagnosed 80s and 90s SPD kid, no one knew enough to put me in a box, so I was always encouraged and challenged. Made things scary but also made me strong and motivated. Love this! Well done, great motto :)
I am always wondering what the future will hold for my children and want to assume that there will eventually be competence in a particular skill or task. It's hard balancing your expectations and what's achievable. Nice post :)
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